This is part 7 of a longer note I received from Bryan R. about the Dave’s “humorously paradoxical lifestyle” as Bryan so nicely put it. For related posts see: Part 1; Part 2; Part 3; Part 4; Part 5; Part 6.
“I’m not sure I have ever met a man as pale as Dave. I’m not even sure I’ve seen nor heard of his feet touching the sand on a beach. Yet somehow Texas stole his heart. “Dude, it’s sick. The complex I live in has a giant pool and chairs to sit on and get your tan on.”
Dave drove slower than the elderly, yet that didn’t stop him from buying a speedy Volkswagen sports car. “Bro, this thing flies. Turbo speed is the best.”
He had a habit of pinching his male-friend’s chests, just to annoy them. God forbid anyone ever try returning the favor. “ooWWWW!” That drawn-out, over-exaggerated yell, with a, “Dude stop, you’re being annoying!”
~Bryan R., NYPD
